Bad Scriptwriting

Scene: 2020, year of COVID pandemic.

Lead Role: female

Co star: 365 allergies

Supporting role: anxiety

January
Lead: “Oh dang. I have a sinus headache again. Pass me the aspirin.”
Co star: “Want to try a decongestant?”
Lead: “Ok but the one that wont make me tired.”

February
Lead: “Oh I have a sinus headache again. Maybe it’s an infection.”
Co star: “Nah, take Sudafed this time.”

March
Lead, annoyed: “Who has allergies in the winter anyway, honestly?”
Support: “Maybe you have that coronavirus they’re talking about.”
Female rolls eyes.

April
Lead: “I mean, I get these headaches all the time; just sinusitis right? I’ll just take my temperature.”
Co star snickers.
Support: “But I have to take Sudafed and it makes me tired but also unable to sleep. How am I supposed to therapize under such influence?” cries

May
Support: “Maybe it’s really coronavirus. Surely one can’t feel this awful from a sinus headache.”
Co star smirks
Lead, to co workers: “No it’s just allergies, I promise. I took my temperature.”

June
Lead: “Why is my body so weird? Who gets a reprieve from allergies in the summer?”
Co star, annoyed: “I’m still here I’m just not destroying your sinuses at the moment. Use the flonase.”
Support: “Should take my temperature to be certain I don’t have coronavirus.”

July
Co star, dancing around gleefully: “Here we go.”
Support: “Oh my God, my head really hurts. Like really. It’s coronavirus, I know it.”
Lead: “I’ll take my temperature.”

August
Co star, screaming: “HAHAHAHAAA you feel like crap don’t you?”
Support: “Should I stay home from work? What if it is coronavirus this time and not allergies?”
Lead: “I took my temperature, it’s fine. I’ll just work from home again to be safe.”
Support: “Oh my God I can’t taste or smell anything!”
Lead: “This happens every time you take Sudafed. Calm down.”

September
Support: “I will never know if I have coronavirus. I should just isolate myself until the pandemic is over.”
Co star falls, laughing hysterically.
Lead: “I need a vacation.”

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